Friday, April 18, 2014

Nose Puppies

[Disclaimer: Parts of this post are NSFW and may be disturbing to readers of a sensitive disposition. Viewer discretion is advised.]

It’s funny how time gets away from you. Twenty-three years ago, Scott Adams drew a Dilbert strip featuring a street vendor selling “Nose Puppies” from a cart; when the title character inquires, the vendor tells him that they are small ceramic puppies that fit inside one’s nose. It is later revealed that the product was never terribly popular until the vendor hit upon the idea of putting them up a customer’s nose, whereupon they became a very fast-selling item. Adams is riffing on the old entrepreneur’s adage of “find a need and fill it” – literally, in this case, since that’s both what one does with a Nose Puppy and the punch line of the first strip – but as silly as this example seems, a great many new companies and the occasional commercial dynasty have been started exactly this way. It wasn’t until this week that I became aware of a company that sells something even more bizarre and inexplicable as a consumer product…

You can pick up the original story about them from the Kernel website if you want to, or visit them on their home page, but unless this is a Penguin Warehouse-style prank, it appears that there really is a company called Ship a Dick, and that for a relatively small fee they will ship a large cardboard representation of male genitalia to the recipient of your choice. It isn’t clear from context in either story why you would want to do such a thing, or to whom you would send it, but the company claims to be moving anywhere from 5 to 15 of these things a day (more around the holidays) in models ranging from $10 to $20 plus shipping and handling, which would translate out to somewhere between $25,000 and $50,000 a year – not an insignificant revenue stream for a side business with effectively no advertising. If marketed properly there is no telling how many of these products they might be able to sell…

Now, according to the linked news story, this isn’t really what the company does. The two entrepreneurs behind it actually run a laser engraving business, putting custom inscriptions onto all manner of things that do not normally carry inscriptions, which is probably where they got the idea for putting customer messages onto cardboard constructs that you (probably) couldn’t show on television. Making and selling these oddball greeting cards (that’s all this really is, if you think about it) is a sideline, and it will probably stay that way – but there aren’t a lot of hobbies that can bring in that kind of revenue, and I’m entirely serious when I suggest that if this idea goes viral the company could produce enough sales to add one or two more zeroes to those revenue figures. At least, until someone else copies their idea and comical, oversized obscene greeting cards become a standard consumer product category…

I call this story to your attention because despite the comical tone and risqué product, this really is an example of an entrepreneurial project that worked. Using skills, equipment, facilities and personnel already available to them, the owners of the company developed a new product, created a new company identity, and are successfully selling to thousands of customers around the world. Continued success will probably require that they develop follow-on products, and most likely that they invest in some marketing activities, but there is reason to believe that despite its absurdity this venture will continue to generate revenue for some time to come. Regardless of how one feels about obscene greeting cards – or Nose Puppies in general – it’s hard to argue that this is an excellent example of a project that created an incremental increase in profits while requiring almost no commitment of resources. Or, in other words, that this is in fact a brilliant entrepreneurial venture…

Even if it is something that the owners of the company probably won’t tell their families about…

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